Do you sometimes feel that your parents gave you less attention than your older and younger siblings? Did you feel you were treated differently than your brothers and/or sisters? Maybe you suffer from middle child syndrome.
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What is middle child syndrome
Maybe middle child syndrome sounds like nonsense to you. Yet many people recognize themselves in this. It was designed to emphasize how a family works and the position of the middle child in this.
Is it a proven ‘syndrome’?
Although middle child syndrome is a reality for some children, it is not a mental illness. Research has been done for years, but there is no factual support for the ‘syndrome’. Research also shows that the order in which children are born has no influence on their position in the family. Why do many children identify with middle child syndrome?
How does the feeling arise?
Middle children sometimes get a little overlooked. Between the eldest and youngest child, the child competes for the parents’ attention. These children sometimes receive less recognition or support from their parents. When they see how their brothers and sisters effortlessly receive the attention that they feel they have to fight for, this has an effect on them as they grow older. Research shows that in an upbringing where the child does not feel fully loved, while the brothers and/or sisters do receive this love, this has consequences.
Implications
There are a number of characteristic features that we recognize in people who identify with the syndrome. They are often hard workers. They go the extra mile to do something right. They also often have great empathy and a less outspoken personality than their brothers and/or sisters. Because these children feel that they have to compete for their parents’ attention, they grow up competitive. As a result, some children who experience the syndrome also have a lot of jealous feelings. They have good communication skills and are often sociable. These people also show more risky behavior. This is due to the freedom they were given in raising children, as the parents were more concerned with the other children.
How do you know if it bothers you?
If you are a child who feels neglected or unseen, you may have middle child syndrome. Because it has no diagnosis, it is truly a ‘syndrome’ that only you feel you are suffering from.