No one wants a difficult conversation, but sometimes it is really necessary. How do you handle that well? These steps will make it a piece of cake.
1. Purpose of a difficult conversation
First, determine the purpose of the conversation: what do you want to achieve, and what concerns you? First of all, let us know that something is going on, some people do not realize that they are doing something that makes you uncomfortable. Then schedule a suitable time: you don’t have to do that right away, because you may want to think about what you want to say first. You should both have the opportunity to tell your story, so make sure you are well prepared to avoid miscommunication.
2. Share your perspective
It is important to think in advance which points you want to raise, so that you can understand each other well. Talk from your own perspective, so that the other person does not quickly feel attacked. Also be careful with your words, for example starting with ‘I have the feeling that…’ instead of ‘you always make sure that…’. By sharing how you feel, you don’t immediately blame someone else, but people can empathize more quickly.
3. Stay objective
Remaining calm and collected is key in a difficult conversation, even if it becomes an emotional one. Control your emotions, and don’t say things out of anger. You may regret this later when the conversation takes a different turn. Do not accuse each other, but discuss concrete examples to remain as objective as possible.
4. Ask open questions
Also listen carefully to what the other person has to say. A good conversation needs to come from both sides, so listen carefully to someone else’s points of view. Are you having trouble maintaining a difficult conversation? Then ask open questions, such as ‘how’, ‘why’ and ‘what’.
5. Summarize the conversation
You can summarize the most important points well: did you come out of it? Repeat these answers so that you both have everything straight and no miscommunication can occur. This way you can work together on a possible compromise to make the bond even stronger.
6. Appreciate each other
Also express that you appreciate each other, otherwise you wouldn’t have a difficult conversation. You both want to do everything you can to maintain the bond, so agree together how you can avoid similar situations in the future and why that is so important. It’s difficult to have a conversation like this, so end the conversation by appreciating that you can both be open with each other.
