This week, Art Rooijakkers visited none other than Leendert Roelandschap, better known as Bizzey, in his program Rooijakkers Over De Vloer. In the episode, the rapper spoke candidly about a difficult period in his life in which he struggled with depression and addiction. A heavy story, but fortunately with a happy ending!
Solo career became too much
In 2019, Bizzey became overwhelmed by the success of his solo career. A combination of extreme fatigue and a weed addiction led to a long-term depression. He felt exhausted and isolated and unable to support his wife Renée. He thought people saw him as a burden and withdrew from his social circle. “They don’t want me anyway. Here he comes again, that dark cloud”, he explains.
Christmas Eve as a turning point
Bizzey’s depression was so severe that he no longer wanted to live. On Christmas Eve he organized a dinner for the The Forgotten Child foundation, which he saw as his last duty. He thought Renée and their son would be better off without him. “I thought: I’ll do that and then I might not be there tomorrow.” But that evening proved to be a turning point. The children touched him deeply because of their purity and the difficult circumstances in which they lived. Their joy made him feel like he mattered after all. “Then, for the first time in a long time, I thought: maybe I’m not a bad person at all. Maybe I’m nice.”
Professional help
The children’s love and gratitude made Bizzey realize he needed professional help. He sought help and kept going back to the foundation to thank them for opening his eyes. “They make me realize that I still have a lot to live for.” This period was also difficult for Renée, but she stayed by his side. She says that she knows the real Leo and cannot imagine that they will not grow old together.
Bizzey finds peace in God
Eventually, Bizzey went to rehab to kick his marijuana addiction. With support from Renée and others, he found the strength to climb out of the valley. “I have become much calmer and have found peace in God,” Bizzey said.
Are you thinking about suicide? Contact 113 Suicide Prevention 24/7 free and anonymously via 0800-0113 or chat on 113.nl.
